- The most useful thing you can do about an unsustainable workload is usually to change the workload, and that means a conversation with whoever sets it. Burnout research points to the job more than to your resilience.
- Christina Maslach and Michael Leiter (World Psychiatry, 2016) link burnout to six mismatches between a person and their work: workload, control, reward, community, fairness and values.
- A 2017 meta-analysis by Maria Panagioti and colleagues in JAMA Internal Medicine found that changing how work was organised reduced physician burnout more than programmes aimed at individual doctors.
- Robert Karasek's job strain research (Administrative Science Quarterly, 1979) found the combination of high demands and low control was the most stressful. You may not be able to cut demands, but you can often ask for more control.
- Go in with a list, not a feeling: what you are doing, what it costs, and a choice for your manager to make. Ask them to choose what drops, rather than asking for permission to struggle less.
In This Article
The most useful thing you can do about an unsustainable workload is usually to change the workload, and that means a conversation with whoever sets it. That sounds obvious. It is also the step most burnout advice skips, in favour of breathing exercises, morning routines and better boundaries. Those help. But the research on burnout keeps pointing in the same direction: the biggest lever is the job, not your resilience.
This guide covers why the conversation matters, how to prepare for it, what to say, and what to do if it goes nowhere. There is a one-page prep sheet near the end. If you are not sure whether what you are feeling is burnout, the burnout self-check takes three minutes.
Why the conversation matters more than coping
Christina Maslach and Michael Leiter, who have studied burnout for decades, describe it as the result of mismatches between a person and their work in six areas: workload, control, reward, community, fairness and values (Maslach & Leiter, 2016). Most of those are set by the job, not by you.
The intervention research points the same way. A 2017 meta-analysis by Maria Panagioti and colleagues looked at controlled trials of ways to reduce burnout in doctors. Changes to how work was organised, such as workload and scheduling, did more than programmes aimed at individual doctors, like mindfulness or resilience training (Panagioti et al., 2017). Personal coping is not useless. It is just not the main event.
There is also a reason the conversation can help even when demands cannot fall. Robert Karasek's research on job strain found that the most stressful combination was high demands with low control: lots to do and little say over how (Karasek, 1979). The later job demands-resources model, developed by Arnold Bakker and Evangelia Demerouti, adds that resources such as support, autonomy and feedback buffer the effect of demands (Bakker & Demerouti, 2007). So if your manager cannot take work away, you can still ask for more control over when and how you do it, or for more support.
What do you say to your manager about workload?
The conversation goes better when it is about choices rather than feelings. "I'm overwhelmed" is true, but it leaves your manager guessing what you need. "Here is everything I'm carrying, here is what is slipping, which of these should move?" gives them something to decide.
A simple structure:
- What you are doing. A short list of your current responsibilities and roughly how much time each takes in a typical week.
- What it is costing. What is late, at risk, being done to a lower standard than it should be, or only getting done in evenings and weekends.
- The choice. Ask them to decide what comes off, moves to a later date, goes to someone else, or gets done to a lower standard.
- What would help if nothing moves. More control over timing, help from a colleague, fewer meetings, or a date when the load is expected to drop.
A script you can adapt:
"I want to talk about my workload, because I don't think the current level is sustainable and I'd rather we choose what gives than have things slip by accident. Here's what I'm working on and roughly how long each part takes. These two are at risk this month, and I'm only keeping up with the rest by working evenings. Could we look at which of these should come off, move, or be done to a lighter standard? If none of it can move, it would help to have more say over when I do the deep work, or some support on this one."
That is it. You are not confessing anything. You are giving your manager information they need to manage.
How to prepare in twenty minutes
Most of the work happens before the meeting. Three things make the biggest difference.
Write the list. Your manager probably does not know everything you do. Write it down: projects, recurring tasks, meetings, the "quick favours" that take an hour each week. Put a rough time against each.
Pick the trade-offs you can live with. Before you ask your manager to choose, know your own answer. Which two items would you drop or delay first? Which one would you most like help with?
Book it as its own meeting. Not the last five minutes of a one-to-one. Say what it is about so neither of you is ambushed: "I'd like twenty minutes to go through my workload and priorities."
If you manage people yourself, do the same exercise for your team. The new manager burnout essay covers why managers in the middle often carry the most invisible load.
What if your manager says everything is a priority?
This is the most common response, and it is not the end of the conversation.
- Ask them to rank. "If I can only fully deliver three of these this month, which three?"
- Ask about standard and timing. "Which of these could be done to a lighter standard, or a few weeks later?"
- Ask for control or support instead. "If the list can't shrink, can I block mornings for focused work and batch meetings in the afternoon?" Karasek's model suggests more control can ease strain even when demands stay the same, though later studies find that effect is not consistent.
- Ask for a date. "When do we expect this to ease? Can we check in then?"
Write a short note afterwards of what you agreed. It helps both of you remember, and it gives you something concrete to point to if you need to raise it again.
If the conversation goes nowhere
Sometimes it will. If nothing changes after a fair attempt:
- Raise it again with specifics: what slipped, what it cost, what you asked for.
- Consider involving HR, a more senior manager, or occupational health if your health is being affected.
- If you have symptoms of burnout or depression, see a doctor. A medical note can make it easier to arrange adjustments.
- Notice whether this is a temporary crunch or a permanent setting. Recovery research is fairly clear that if the drain never stops, rest alone will not catch up. Our guide to how long burnout recovery takes explains why.
This is general guidance, not legal or employment advice. Your rights and options depend on where you work and your contract.
A one-page prep sheet
Copy this into a note before the meeting.
What I'm responsible for (and rough hours per week)
- ...
- ...
- ...
What's slipping or at risk
- ...
What it's costing me (evenings, weekends, sleep, quality)
- ...
My suggested trade-offs
- Drop or delay: ...
- Hand to someone else: ...
- Do to a lighter standard: ...
If nothing can move, what would help
- More control over: ...
- Support with: ...
- A date to review: ...
What we agreed (fill in afterwards)
- ...
The point of all this
It can feel safer to cope quietly: one more evening, one more weekend, one more breathing exercise. But burnout research keeps landing on the same conclusion. The conditions of the work matter more than how well you endure them. A twenty-minute conversation is often the most effective recovery tool you have, and it is one only you can start.
Related reading: Burnout Recovery: What Actually Works · New Manager Burnout · Founder Mental Health
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Frequently Asked Questions
How do I tell my manager I have too much work?
Be specific and bring a decision for them to make. List what you are currently responsible for, roughly how long each part takes, and what is slipping or at risk. Then ask them to choose: which of these should come off, move, or get done to a lower standard? Framing it as a priorities question rather than a complaint makes it easier for both of you.
Will talking about workload make me look weak?
It is a common fear. A conversation about priorities, trade-offs and quality reads as judgment, not weakness, especially when you come with specifics and options. Saying nothing tends to be riskier: the work slips anyway, without anyone having chosen what slips.
What if my manager says everything is a priority?
Ask them to rank the list, or ask which items can be done to a lower standard or on a later date. If nothing can move, ask for something else that helps: more control over how and when you work, help from someone else, or a date when the load is expected to drop.
What if the conversation goes nowhere?
Write down what you raised and what was agreed, and raise it again with specifics if nothing changes. You can also involve HR, a more senior manager, or occupational health if your health is being affected. If you have symptoms of burnout or depression, a doctor can help, and a medical note can make adjustments easier to arrange. This is general guidance, not legal or employment advice.
Is this different if I am a manager or founder?
The principle is the same, but the person you negotiate with changes. Managers need the conversation with their own manager and often with their team about what not to do. Founders may need it with a co-founder or board, and with themselves about what the company will stop doing.